3 in 1 post just for fun

*LETTER TO MY UNBORN SON* When our Family Doctor called yesterday to inform me that my wife (your mother) is 2months pregnant, I thought I should write this to inform you to remember to choose football as a career and destiny. I don't think U get me! Choose football if you no want make I carry cow horn swear for you. Choose football oooo oooo eh! Eh! You want to ask why. Oya read the following. ... I was *WOWED* When I break down Carlos Tevez £615,000 weekly wage @ Shanghai Shenhua .. *£32million per year* #19,200,000,000 (19.2 Billion) *£615 per week* #369,000,000(369 million) *£88,000 per day* #52,800,000(52.8 million) *£3,600 per hour*#2,160,000 *£60 per minute* #36,000 *£1 per second* #600 This means that if Carlos Tevez drops 500 naira on the floor, by the time he's picked it up again, he would have earned a further 1,200 naira. I'm telling you this because I DEMAND that you ask Baba God to give you talent for sports (especially football or basketball). Don't tell me you want to sing o, or be a blogger or an actor, I had always had it in mind you are going to be a politician, but not anymore; with all the 8 years embezzlement, Fayose is not even as rich as Carlos Tevez (yet, EFCC is waiting for him) Therefore, Come rain come shine, by fire by thunder, I WILL MAKE SURE YOU DO SPORTS! I will not allow you watch any Nickelodeon or Disney Channel - It's Super Sports, ESPN, Sky Sports, Fox Sports etc. from the day you are born! I will enroll you in a sports academy before enrolling you in any other yeye school. The only video games I will let you play are PES and FIFA. Just let this sink in. *Yours Truly "No Nonsense Father* Words for My Lady I knew this day would eventually come When I'd want to say these words to you And it's with these words I hold in my heart That I now feel I need to renew I've thought about what I want to say And was waiting for when the time was right To say exactly what's on my mind While you're sitting here with me tonight I know I get caught up in my own little world And sometimes I tend to forget The true meaning of those little words Which entered my heart the day we first met If you'll move just a little bit closer I'll describe the moment when this all began When I knew you'd be my special lady And I would be your lucky man It was an evening in time when I held you close As we listened to the falling rain Sitting in front of a warm flickering fire Sharing our dreams with a glass of champagne Somehow, I never could have imagined Spending an evening like that with you As we talked between the falling raindrops And expressing our points of view With my arms wrapped around you I thought about how hard it would be to let you go Then you turned around and kissed me Only then at that moment did I really know We fell in love on that special night But I couldn't find the words to say As you were the only one in my life Who has ever made me feel that way When I looked deep into your eyes And then I took your hand I knew that all I ever needed Was to love and to hold you all that I can You became a part of my little world And knew that I could never let you go Because your love meant so much to me More than you could possibly ever know After all these years of being together I needed to say how much I still care And the only thing I ever wished for Was that you would always be there You will always be my special lady And I love you so very much I'd be lost in my little world without you To share your love and your touch With you by my side and a fire to keep us warm We'll always welcome the falling rain When we're holding each other and never letting go As we fall in love all over again The words in my heart still mean the same After all these years of being with you And the best part of all was knowing That my very special lady still loves me too EPISODE 1 . . . *ping* my BlackBerry Q10 vibrated (oh yeah, I use a Q5. Just wanted to take style and tell you) So. I had actually been on Facebook digging into the pictures of my newest Facebook crush when that ping came in (by the way, I might probably “expose” the facebook username of the Facebook crush at the end of this *winks*) Alright. Let me focus on the story. I need to stop digressing. *takes a deep breath* So, the ping. I minimized my browser and went to BBM to see the evil spirit that was disturbing my life with a freaking BBM ping (I hate pings, by the way, and I always forget to deactivate the vibrations that come with them. After typing this I need go deactivate that thing) So, straight outta Facebook I balled into BBM and lo and behold it was Jaga. That idiot. No, Jaga is not his real name. That’s just what we call him. It’s actually a short version of Jaga Jaga. I don’t know how such evil nickname was given to him. Actually the fool na my guy, and the mumu boy just loves two things in his life more than anything – women and weed…aside from that, the guy no get wahala sha. So I received his message. “Fool”. I typed. “Why you won kill my battery”. Pim. I sent it. He received the message and started typing. I watched the typing thing that shows up near someone’s bbm name when he is typing and waited. Pim. His message entered. “Guy, e get one babe wey dey trip for you here o” I squeezed face. Which type of mumu message is this again. I just received the message, bone the guy and returned to Facebook to continue checking out my crush’s picture from where I stopped. Ping Ping Ping. Three pings, I nearly mad. I rushed back to BBM. “Guy, why u won kill my ba3 na. You chop mess?”. I sent it. “Fool”. He replied. “I won change your life” Then he sent me a picture. I opened it. And my eye “shined”. See, is not like I fall in and out of like easily sha but mehn, I saw that picture and forgot about the other girl I was checking out on Facebook. “Who be this babe”

from Echo http://ift.tt/2jesjZC